Be on the lookout for these computer viruses:

	* The Lorena Bobbit Virus:  turns you hard disk into a 3.5 inch floppy
	* The Woody Allen Virus:  bypasses the motherboard and turns on a
	  daughter card
	* The Tonya Harding Virus:  turns your .BAT files into lethal weapons
	* The Paul Revere Virus:  warns of an impending virus infection:  1 if
	  by LAN, 2 if by C:\
	* The Hillary Rodham Clinton Virus:  instantly turns 1K of disk space
	  into 1 Meg
	* The Ollie North Virus:  plays a patriotic .WAV while it shreds your
	  files
	* The Joey Buttafuaco Virus:  only attacks minor files
	* The Michael Jackson Virus:  preys on child processes
	* The Barney Virus:  it loves you / you hate it.  Turns your screen
	  purple
	* The Ronald Reagan Virus:  saves your data, but forgets where it's
	  stored
	* The Jane Fonda Virus:  attacks your hard drive's FAT table
	* The Oprah Winfrey Virus:  first it's a big file, then a small file,
	  then a big file...